Back to New York

Fall break has come and gone, and I’ve returned to my old friend, Amtrak, for my venture back into the city. Break was so sweet and good, albeit short. I went to camp over the weekend and worked a retreat with several good friends from the summer. I had no idea how healing it would be to be back there, even if it was for less than 48 hours. I left everything behind, King’s, the house, schoolwork that is seriously piling up right now, and just served. I swept floors and prepped tables for meals, I sat up in the freefall tower with my good friend, Caitlin, for three hours, I sat on the dock Sunday morning and had a much needed quiet time. It was truly life-giving.

I only had a short time of home, but that was nice and restful too. But the rest of October is looking more and more formidable. I have quizzes, papers, presentations, and midterms ahead of me. I can’t think about it too much without wanting to throw up. But once I get through November, things will be ok, right? Right.

I know everything will get done, but it has been stressful. I want to relish fall, and enjoy the semester, but I can’t help but look forward to Christmas break. I mean, three weeks without anything planned or anything due? Glory.

New York is a funny place, It’s the place people with dreams and ambitions go to see those dreams come true. Every opportunity seems to be here, with every career and lifestyle offered. Maybe some people come here and have those dreams come true, or maybe new dreams pop up. Maybe some people fall in love with the city, and end up never leaving. But I have found for myself, and quite a few other people at my school, that New York has proved to us that we could be perfectly content living in a small town and living a quiet life. New York tires you, it hardens you in some ways. It can also be pretty magical, but those magical moments are not daily life in the city. For most of us, New York is a season in our lives, and we will move onto a new season once we graduate or maybe a few years after. The glitz and glamor of the city fades, and the desire for prestige and success does as well. Or at least, it has for me. All I want to do once I graduate is be a missionary, or work for a missions organization. Maybe a church. Than I want to be a mom. That’s it. So, no thank you for the networking opportunities, or the promise that “if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere”. New York, I will always have a place in my heart for you, but it’s for the people here, not the city. The city can be grand, but the city is broken. Lord, the city needs you.


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